Musings of a Penniless Writer

The Penniless Query Project #1

2012-01-22T17:19:00.005+11:00

Today I am thrilled to post the first request in the Penniless Query project.

Gist: Writers submit a query to PennilessQuery@gmail.com and once a month it will be opened to a critique here.

So without further ado, here is the first query. I will post it in its entirety, and then critique it paragraph by paragraph underneath. Please feel free to offer any suggestions in the comments, but play nicely! This is my sandpit and I will kick you out if you are mean!

Would you be interested in representing my first novel called Pot, Kettle & Black? It is a Young Adult novel and stands at 90,000 words.

Amy Pot, Molly Kettle and Simone Black have been friends since Kindergarten. Now they are about to graduate from Austen Academy: a school for gifted kids who have a penchant for seeking out trouble.

One week before Graduation, the House Master is discovered dead in his study. No one is suspicious, with the exception of Pot, Kettle and Black, who saw a mysterious figure in black shimmying down the drainpipe just before the body was discovered. The police won’t take them seriously, neither do other teachers or their parents, after all, they are only sixteen-years-old and shouldn’t have been beyond the boundaries of their dormitories in the first place.

Then the headless body of a stranger is discovered in the Academy grounds and Graduation is cancelled. Pot, Kettle and Black face a race against time to solve the mystery and get the Graduation they deserve.

I am a big fan of Ally Carter and hope to emulate her success with my own writing. I was previously an intern at [redacted] and learnt a lot about the publishing process through [redacted].

Critique

Would you be interested in representing my first novel called Pot, Kettle & Black? It is a Young Adult novel and stands at 90,000 words.

First of all, I fricking LOVE the title. A good title grabs me straight away and that was why I picked this one. I don't like starting a query with a question though. How about "I am looking for representation for..." BE CONFIDENT! And don't say it is your first novel either. An agent may think "newbie" and move straight towards a form rejection. DO NOT give an agent an excuse - however tenuous - to reject you. I also think 90,000 words is too long. You'll need to shave a good 10,000 words minimum off that for a contemporary YA - possibly more.

Amy Pot, Molly Kettle and Simone Black have been friends since Kindergarten. Now they are about to graduate from Austen Academy: a school for gifted kids who have a penchant for seeking out trouble.

This is a nice introduction to the main characters but I am confused by the school. Is the school for trouble seeking kids, or merely a school that has more than its fair share of trouble seeking kids? There is a distinction and you need to make it.

One week before Graduation, the House Master is discovered dead in his study. No one is suspicious, with the exception of Pot, Kettle and Black, who saw a mysterious figure in black shimmying down the drainpipe just before the body was discovered. The police won’t take them seriously, neither do other teachers or their parents, after all, they are only sixteen-years-old and shouldn’t have been beyond the boundaries of their dormitories in the first place.

Hmmm. I like the premise, but why won't anyone take them seriously? I studied criminal law, and believe me, a witness is a witness. Age is irrelevant unless the witness is so young they have no comprehension skills, which of course a 16-year-old would have. Just because they were beyond the dorm, doesn't mean they shouldn't be taken seriously. Expand on this a little as well - entice a reader with more. Why is no one suspicious for a start?

Then the headless body of a stranger is discovered in the Academy grounds and Graduation is cancelled. Pot, Kettle and Black face a race against time to solve the mystery and get the Graduation they deserve.

Eek, I hope the characters aren't so shallow that all they care about is getting a graduation; you aren't going to win many friends there. By all means make the characters dimensional, but you have to make them likable as well. Is this now a murder story? I'm still confused by the lack of detail.

I am a big fan of Ally Carter and hope to emulate her success with my own writing. I was previously an intern at [redacted] and learnt a lot about the publishing process through [redacted].

The first sentence is a neat way to end the query. You know your audience and who you are pitching towards. I removed the two firm names because I wasn't sure you wanted to be identified, although I wouldn't actually add them in the first place because knowing about the publishing process doesn't make you a good writer - you have to show that with your query and any sample. Publishing credits can be added but don't feel the need to pad the query out with fluff. At the end of the day, it is all about the writing.

I don't hold to the "300 words only" form of query. For sure there are some agents who want it short and concise, but I have never written a query under 500 words and I've never had a problem with requests. It always amuses me that it is the agent wanting fewer words that is usually the one asking for more detail! I would add a few more sentences at least to this query. Sharp dramatic lines that will entice an agent to read sample pages. You sound like you know your genre and your audience. Now prove it.

E-book review: Spell Circles by Simon Kewin

2012-01-21T20:33:00.002+11:00

In my opinion, short stories (along with poetry) are really difficult to do well. Because the author doesn't have the time to build up a premise or characters, it really is all down to the writing and nothing else.

Simon Kewin is a very talented writer, and nothing displays that more than the witty short fiction that appears in between the longer stories in Spell Circles. He can craft with one sentence what a lot of writers fail to achieve with a fifteen page chapter. This ebook is jam-packed, but my personal favourite was the Faerie tale which I found enjoyable but also moving.

This is the first epublished-only book I have bought and it won't be the last. Spell Circles completely dispels any fear I had about substandard formatting taking over ebooks. It is so professional, it leaves several of "the classics" on my iPad severely wanting.

A definite recommend.

I only ever had a 2% chance!

2012-01-20T09:07:00.003+11:00

I’ve debated long and hard about publishing this post. In fact it has been in the “publish” section of my blog for a couple of days now. The reason for my procrastination is that I end up looking like a bit of an idiot! Ultimately though, if my experience can help others learn the hard realities of traditional publishing, then only good can come out of it.

First of all, just reacquaint yourselves with my “Sucking Scale of Suckage” post here. Brief synopsis: after 9 months of communication, a revise and resubmit, and then a full editorial, an agent I was 95% certain was going to offer me representation, ultimately said no. (After I had declined two other offers from agents in the process!)

Then go read literary agent, Victoria Marini’s post here. Brief synopsis: it details the reality of that kind of agent editorial feedback.

Did you make the connection?

My agent M in the suckage post is indeed Ms Marini!

Now I want to start off by saying that I do not regret for a single second the time I spent on the revisions – and there were a lot of them – that Ms Marini suggested. She made my manuscript better. Period. She is a great editor and anyone working with her is lucky. She gave me a heads up about the revision post and has proven herself to be a class act in correspondence since that ultimate decline.

What I do regret, and what I wish I had known at the very beginning, was the fact that I only had a 2% chance of being offered representation at the end of it all.

Ms Marini and I exchanged a large number of emails over the course of 9 months. Some of them were initiated by her. What is now obvious is that I read far more into this exchange than I ever should have done. Yet I defy anyone not to get excited when an industry professional is telling you how much they love your novel. And Ms Marini really got my novel. Every single suggestion she made went to the heart of the characters and the story.

So to receive her final email was beyond crushing. My stomach hurt. For the first time in my writing life I actually cried. I thought of giving up. I just couldn’t do this anymore because the stress was becoming unbearable.

My pity-me party lasted about an hour and then the puppy needed feeding and my kids woke up and The Hobbit trailer got released and I freaked out a little bit and realised I should stop being a drama queen and get on with living the 99% of my life that doesn’t revolve around writing!

But what I really want people to learn from this is that it is okay to get excited about requests for partials and fulls. You’re doing something right. It is okay to be really happy when you get suggested revisions and an offer to resubmit. You can only learn and benefit from the advice.

BUT DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT fall into my trap and assume that you are going to be offered representation in these very difficult times because of it. As Ms Marini points out, your odds are 2% at most even after the revisions.

It has never been harder to get a literary agent. They are only taking on projects that they absolutely fall in love with from the first page. Even then, how many agented authors are getting those publishing deals? Very, very few.

Keep on writing. Keep on submitting. Keep on learning.

Just be realistic and learn from my mistake. I'm off to put that fool's hat on now!

Is this the future of traditional publishing?

2012-01-17T07:10:00.002+11:00

I've spent the last couple of days comforting a distraught friend.

She has an agent, and after ten months on submission, she finally has a one book publishing deal with the option for a second.

Cause for celebration, yes? I was certainly thrilled for her.

So why is she distraught?

Because her publishing deal is for an e-book format only. No hardback, not even a paperback. She will have the backing of a major print, but she will not have what she always dreamed of: her title in paper and ink.

My opinion is that this could well be the way forward. Her advance is very small, but it is still an advance. Her book will still be edited by professionals and she doesn't need to worry about formatting!! (Not sure my attempt at brevity went down that well!)

So is this the future of traditional publishing? As more and more readers turn to e-books, will we see far fewer titles on paper?

Which begs another question? If writers can upload to e-readers themselves, what is the point in a traditional press?

The world is changing.

NOT ACCEPTABLE

2012-01-15T18:28:00.004+11:00

Writers are constantly told by industry insiders to be professional.

So could someone please explain to me why a well known agent thought it was acceptable to call a reviewer "that bitch" on Goodreads?

Read the response and fallout here.

I read about this over on Absolute Write and couldn't believe it. No one likes a bad review, but seriously? Agents and authors can only do themselves harm by engaging in such behaviour. How many readers will now boycott this novel because of the behaviour of the agent?

What I would like to see in The Hobbit movies

2012-01-13T18:33:00.004+11:00

I've just finished reading the enhanced e-book of The Hobbit. It was my first ever e-book purchase. Yay, go me!

Seriously, if you are a fan, BUY IT! It comes with recordings of Tolkien and coloured drawings. Tis a thing of beauty, people.

What hasn't changed from my 25-year-old battered paper copy is the fact that The Hobbit is actually a badly structured novel. Now don't get me wrong, I WORSHIP at the temple of the Misty Mountains and love anything Middle Earth related, but, The Hobbit is definitely not of the calibre of The Lord of the Rings.

The novel doesn't flow with the narrative. You get a chapter - something happens - chapter finishes - new chapter and repeat. A lot of the action happens off page and it is definitely written for a younger audience.

But now we have Sir Peter Jackson and his outstanding team in charge of the film adaptation, and I am very confident that we will see a far more linear, yet still action-packed, telling of the story.

Firstly, I want to see the Battle of the Five Armies. We know Jackson can kick arse with a fight - (Helm's Deep, Minas Tirith) - and I want part two to be dripping in violence!

Secondly, I want the deaths to mean something. Why oh why did Tolkien have such a problem with death scenes. We never read Boromir's final act of heroism in The Lord of the Rings, and The Hobbit is the same. Several main characters die in The Hobbit. I want tears dammit, not an afterthought.

Thirdly, I want the dwarfs to be heroic. The scriptwriters did a fabulous job with Gimli in The Lord of the Rings and I would like the same treatment to the dwarfs in The Hobbit. The book makes them out to be rather foolish, stumbling from one chapter to another. By all means keep the fun, but don't make them out to be morons.

Finally, I would like to see Aragorn! The story totally lends itself to a cameo from Viggo. There is Rivendell or even Mirkwood for the location. We know Legolas and Aragorn are friends before The Lord of the Rings and Aragorn was raised in Rivendell. He isn't in the book but it would not extend artistic licence to have a few scenes.

So I know Sir Peter Jackson reads this blog!!! What are you waiting for, great man? Get to it!

Pay it Forward: Introducing the Penniless Query project

2012-01-10T18:43:00.005+11:00

I would like to pay it forward to show my sincere thanks and appreciation to all of those writers who have helped me over the course of the last year. Your critiques, emails with advice and supportive comments have helped keep me sane.

I am in a really good place as we start 2012. Plans are well underway for this to be the year I become a published author. My writing is going well; I've already started getting requests for the project I am querying; and the ms I intend to e-publish already has people in place to help me.

So, what is this post about? I would like to introduce you to the Penniless Query project.

If there is one thing I am really good at, it is a query. My first novel gained me an agent after four queries. The project I currently have underway garnered 18 requests and 2 offers (both of which were declined.) I started sending queries out last week for my new ms and got a request within 24 hours.

I'm not bragging, (well perhaps a little :P), after all, I still don't have that elusive publishing deal, but I can do this.

So I would like to help writers perfect their query with the Penniless Query project.

It is quite simple: once a month I will put a call out for submissions and anyone who would like their query critiqued can send it to a dedicated email address: PennilessQuery@gmail.com

I will pick one at random and critique it here on the blog. You can do it anonymously or under a pen name, or those who are really brave can use the name you were born with - or someone elses!

Regardless, I want to help.

There are fantastic sites out there already offering this service; I am not offering anything new. However, I hope that this project will be embraced with the goodwill that was intended.

Writers helping writers.

The first call for submissions is now. I look forward to reading your amazing stories.

Falling in love again

2012-01-04T19:09:00.002+11:00

I wrote my first YA fantasy novel in 2010. It was one of those bolt-out-of-the-blue concepts that tend to hit writers right between the eyes.

I had never written YA before, and so it was a real learning curve. Several agents expressed interest and I was really lucky to get some fantastic advice and critiques, including one from Rosemary Stimola (Suzanne Collins agent). I knew I was too inexperienced at that time to get an agent with the manuscript, but I also knew the premise was too good to hit the delete key and forget about it.

In 2011 I spent a good four months rewriting it. I then got sidetracked by another ms which was also getting a lot of interest.

A new year though brings with it a new outlook and I decided to give that first ms another look.

Fucking hell it is good!!!!!

Am I even allowed to say that? I'm not an arrogant person, but I'm not filled with self-loathing or insincere insecurities either. I'm not saying it is going to land me a publishing deal or anything - lets face it, few books are doing that these days - but hell it is certainly good enough to have another crack at it.

So that is my delightful distraction whilst I format for e-publishing. I am going to give the traditional route another shot.

I now have one book to query, one book to finish writing, and one book to format for e-publishing. I'm a woman - multitasking is my middle name!

Formatting for Amazon questions

2012-01-02T15:18:00.003+11:00

1) Is it best to do Ctrl A on the whole ms and clear everything and then go through each chapter and format from the top tool bar?

2) Does a ms need to be double-spaced for uploading?

I am getting my head around the process - slowly!

And for you guys who are helping me, my sincere thanks will be in the form of buying your ebooks!

My own, my precious!

2011-12-31T06:13:00.003+11:00

Only one resolution for me in 2012: I will take back ownership of my writing.

I still believe in traditional publishing, absolutely, but no longer will my sense of self as a writer be inextricably linked to how others behave.

Whether it is traditional paper and ink press, e-publishing, or self-publishing, I believe 2012 will be the year when writers decide to do what is best for them.

Writers are the most important aspect of the literary world and it is about time we started to remember that.

So here's to an awesome 2012, filled with books, books, and more precious books!

E-publishing help required

2011-12-28T08:48:00.004+11:00

OK awesome bloggy friends, I need your help.

For reasons that are blindingly obvious after my last post, I have decided to e-publish a manuscript (or two) in 2012. I'm seriously excited about this new direction, but I want to make sure I do it properly.

Do you have any links or advice or even know of any publications that I should buy to help me learn about the process of e-publishing? Initially I am going for Amazon, but ultimately I intend to e-publish on all available platforms.

I know we are in that quiet period between Xmas and New Year, but if anyone can spare the time to advise, I will be eternally grateful.

So on the sucking scale of utter suckage, how much does this suck?

2011-12-23T12:33:00.005+11:00

March 2011: Query sent to agent M;

April 2011: Request for full from agent M;

June 2011: Writer receives revise and resubmit from agent M;

August 2011: Agent M advises writer she LOVES ms and wants to do a full editorial. Writer agrees;

October 2011: Revised ms sent back to agent M;

December 2011: Writer receives offer from a different agent. Agent M is advised by email. 3 minutes later asks for time to finish reading. Subsequently starts to follow writer on twitter and within an hour has tweeted what a pleasure well revised manuscripts are. Author gets excited and decides to turn down other agent. 4 days before Xmas, agent M turns down ms even though she thinks she will kick herself later!

Writer drowns in suckage!

I can smile about this now but two days ago, Niagara Falls baby!

Decisions

2011-12-17T20:40:00.002+11:00

I have a big decision to make over the course of the next week. I've even thought about emailing a couple of you for advice!

I'm all for being informed, but sometimes too much information can be a bad thing. Do you trust your head? Your heart? Your digestive track?!

Do you take the advice of others, or do you just battle it out in your own head?

At the end of the day, life is about choices. Is there such a thing as a bad choice? Can you only do what is best for you at any particular moment in time?

2011: My Year in Books

2011-12-06T20:58:00.004+11:00

Total number of books read in 2011: forty seven

Favourite new book: Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins

Least enjoyed: The Name of the Star by Maureen Johnson

Most loved re-read: The Harry Potter series

Favourite non-fiction read: The Fry Chronicles by Stephen Fry

Favourite newly discovered author: Laini Taylor

Book I would give to people I love: Divergent by Veronica Roth

Book I would give to people I hate: Didn't read a book this year that I actually hated!

Your book isn't good enough for the Penguin?

2011-11-21T05:46:00.004+11:00

I am really really happy to be corrected on this. I'm late to the party, having been away, and I am only just catching up on the storm around Book Country: Penguin's foray into self-publishing.

Now from what I can tell, there is the standard fee (varies) for using the service in the first place ($99 - $549). Your book is formatted, uploaded and then Book Country keep a further 30% on top of your 70% cut from sites like Amazon. (Seems to me that they are just a middle man that can be cut out if you just format yourself.)

But what really galls me about Book Country, is that the Penguin logo is used on the actual website, but it will not appear on your book!

Now like I said, I am happy to be corrected on this, but it appears to me that while Penguin are happy to take your money and use their logo to get your patronage in the first place, they are ashamed of the finished product and won't allow it to be instantly recognised as a Penguin book.

Either this is a Penguin service or it isn't. Make the distinction and don't con people.

I believe the words you are looking for are...

2011-11-18T05:43:00.002+11:00

WHAT.THE.FUCK?!

Yes, that is a tattoo.

Full story here.

Quick self-publishing poll

2011-11-15T05:33:00.002+11:00

I think we will look back on 2011 as the year when writers decided to take ownership of their manuscripts. More and more writers on my blog roll are now announcing their plans to self-publish, and good luck to them.

So I thought I would just test the water by asking a couple of questions:

1) Has your position on self-publishing as a valid route to publication changed?

2) Do you see yourself self-publishing at some point in the future?

I would be interested to see what fellow writers think.

Not doing NaNo, so what do I blog about part IV?

2011-11-11T06:09:00.000+11:00

Literary Super Heroes.

Apostrophe Man!

Think of some more and we'll create our own X-Men!

Not doing NaNo, so what do I blog about part III?

2011-11-07T18:34:00.003+11:00

Dear writers of Terra Nova,

MAKE ME CARE!

The characters in this show are so devoid of any characteristics that I...what's the word I'm looking for?...oh yeah...LIKE, I am cheering on the dinosaurs every week.

Carnotaurus Vs hugely irritating teenage son?

Eat him! Eat him!

Not doing NaNo, so what do I blog about part II?

2011-11-04T05:53:00.003+11:00

Katie Price aka Jordan the "Glamour Model" has just released her 45th book.

She hasn't written any of them!

She is regarded as one of Britain's best-selling authors!

NaNo-ers, try not to impale yourselves on the letter Z as you slave away out there!

Not doing NaNo, so what do I blog about?

2011-11-02T06:18:00.000+11:00

Well it made me LOL!

Reviews: Lola and the Boy Next Door/Daughter of Smoke & Bone

2011-10-29T15:27:00.003+11:00

Two eagerly anticipated novels.
Two supremely talented writers.
Two very different reading experiences.

I read Anna and the French Kiss in its first week of release. Bloody loved it. Loved Anna. Loved St Clair. Loved the American School. Loved Paris. And above all, I loved Stephanie Perkins' way of writing YA contemporary. I knew I would have to import Lola and the Boy Next Door on US release because I simply couldn't wait.

It doesn't disappoint. The quirky, fumbling prose is absolutely perfect for a seventeen-year-old. Cricket is even more lovable than St Clair and Lola's parents are wonderful. I didn't like Lola as much as I loved Anna, but there were times when her story made me die with giddiness. It is such an easy read I finished it within a day.

Daughter of Smoke & Bone by Laini Taylor is an altogether different book. It is YA fantasy, but written like literary fiction. I don't think I have ever read a YA book like it, and I want to salute the editors out there who are willing to take a risk with such sophisticated writing. I loved the world and the mythology and Akiva - OMG Akiva! We are talking the antithesis of Edward Cullen here while still possessing many of the same characteristics.

Two amazing reads. I recommend them both.

Letting go

2011-10-27T20:27:00.003+11:00

Every writer needs to let go at some point.

There will be those who decide to let go of an unfinished manuscript because it simply isn't working.

There will be those who are sending their finished manuscripts out from the safety of a hard drive to another reader to critique.

There will be critiqued manuscripts that are being sent out into the scary world of the slush pile.

And there will be those books that have been fed, nurtured, loved and ultimately published that simply don't belong to the writer anymore, but instead have found new owners and a shiny new bookcase to live in, far away from that original home and heart that created it.

It's a horrible feeling, letting go. We fall in love with our characters and worlds and the desire to protect them from hurtful words is all encompassing.

But ultimately you get to a stage where you know you can't write another word; you can't edit the same sentence again; there is nothing left to do.

You have to let go.

YA lurve

2011-10-22T09:34:00.003+11:00

A BIG box from Amazon.com was waiting on my doorstep yesterday.

Not one of these books is available yet where I live but hey, that is what international shipping is for!

The sun is shining. If you need me, I'll be in my garden reading Lola...

I made the right decision

2011-10-20T05:36:00.002+11:00

You may remember that about a month ago I blogged about the fact that I had said no to an agent.

One of my concerns was that advice and chatter on Absolute Write had indicated that this agent had taken on 85 clients in the past year alone, but hadn't appeared to have made any sales.

Since September, this agent - who really was lovely - has taken on several more clients. My blog roll recently has featured two excited announcements from writers.

Now I do not want to piss on anyone's parade. If those writers believe this agent is the best fit for them, then AWESOME! Brilliant. Go for it and I wish you all the luck in the world with your new partnership.

But me? I haven't regretted saying no for a single second. I made the right decision.

The Overwriter

2011-10-14T15:00:00.003+11:00

I love words! I love the English language. I love any language, especially ones based around Latin.

I love finding new words. I love crosswords. I love my thesaurus and my dictionary.

I love writing with lots of words. Flowery prose and metaphors and expression and onomatopoeia...

Isn't onomatopoeia a great word?!

And of course I put this love and passion into my writing and I am left with ONE HOT FRIGGING MESS!

It is my biggest flaw, especially as I write YA.

Now I don't subscribe to the view that literature for teens should be dumbed down - absolutely not. The English language is there to be used.

However, because I write in a first person narrative, I have got to get out of the habit of overwriting. That is great for writing literary fiction, but not YA.

You see, this is why writing YA is so hard, because you have to be realistic as well as entertaining. My audience can smell bullshit a mile off, and so can agents and editors.

Trim the fat. Axe unnecessary fillers or passive voice. Never use "whilst"! Less is more.

DO NOT OVERWRITE!

grumble

2011-10-08T16:30:00.003+11:00

I don't grumble very often on this blog, so please excuse this little pity-me post.

Nothing major has happened to warrant it before anyone asks. Dreams haven't been shattered; I haven't lost any manuscripts in a hard drive failure of doom; not even a rejection email has come my way!

But...

...sometimes I just wish I could be myself on this blog - or at least more of myself than I am. I hold back. I don't share the good news as often as I would like because I don't want to jinx things, and I don't share the bad because I don't want people to read this blog and see something in the words that isn't actually there.

So I hold back. I'm not myself. And that pisses me off.

Instead I end up emailing Suzie over at My Not So Secret Writing Life and she is the one who keeps me sane. (Seriously, every writer needs a Suzie! I would be a gibbering wreck right now without her.)

Am I the only one who feels like this? Musings of a Penniless Writer should be renamed Some Safe Musings of a Penniless Writer that May Be Deleted At Some Point!

Music to inspire

2011-10-01T19:01:00.004+10:00

Do you write in silence or with a soundtrack?

This year I've really started to embrace the idea of having music on in the background whilst I type away. I'm a film soundtrack nerd, and I find that listening to scores really helps with my creativity.

Because I write fantasy, I find I listen to the Harry Potter soundtracks ALL THE TIME! It is cliched, but there is something magical in those scores that transcends art.

The soundtrack to the Angels and Demons movie is brilliant. My WIP series is set back in time, and the haunting choral voices juxtaposed with the classical orchestra is fantastic for creating the right atmosphere for fight scenes.

Can't beat Lord of the Rings of course, especially as my WIP love interest is an 18-year-old version of Aragorn!

Hey, if Stephenie Meyer can fall in love with a sparkly vampire, then I can fall in love with a knight!

Oops, may have just let slip there what my series is about.

Other favourites are the score to A Beautiful Mind - Paul Bettany for pure hotness value - and the unbelievably brilliant piano of Jean-Yves Thibaudet in the recent Pride & Prejudice adaptation.

Hmmmm, I'm seeing a theme here that has nothing to do with music: hot men!

Okay, I'm changing my picture. It was musical notes but I reckon we deserve Ewan McGregor!

I'm just too good to you.

Why I've turned down an agent

2011-09-21T05:43:00.005+10:00

You have read that correctly. I've done what many would regard as the unthinkable and said no to an agent.

It wasn't an easy decision. Many emails batted back and forth and I pondered on the situation for a while. In fact it happened a couple of weeks ago and I only feel happy to discuss it now - which is rather silly really.

So here is why I said no.

The agent herself was full of enthusiasm, and definitely my kind of person. I think we would have worked well together. However, there was a little voice that got progressively louder and louder that kept saying she wasn't my agent.

Her agency was small. The website was kind of folksy and people based rather than product based, and that set alarms bells ringing. I was seriously concerned by the number of clients she was signing up. Eighty five according to Absolute Write! That just seemed to be an unmanageable workload. I don't expect undivided attention from an agent, but I don't want to slip through the cracks either.

Two years ago I accepted an offer of representation from a leading UK literary agent. It was the first offer ever made to me and I fell over myself to go with her. It turned out to be the biggest mistake of my writing life to date. She sent the manuscript to three editors - and then gave up after three rejections. She was more worried about her own reputation within the agency than my novel. Six months later I, and several other writers without publishing deals, were advised - by her assistant - that we should look elsewhere.

The shock and humiliation of this rejection was something that took me a year to get over. I thought about giving up, that I had had my chance and blown it big time. My writing suffered and I produced utter garbage because my confidence was gone.

But time is a healer and two years later my writing has improved and I have found my genre. Yet it was a painful lesson and one I was determined to learn from.

Because having the wrong agent is worse than having no agent at all.

I can't make you believe that statement, but it is true. This agent wasn't the right person for me.

So I politely declined. No bridges were burnt and we parted on great terms. The door was left open to return to her if other avenues didn't work out.

So I've done it. I've turned down an agent. My writing is mine and I will do what is best for me.

Would you tell the truth?

2011-09-17T17:44:00.003+10:00

I have never posted an excerpt of my writing on this blog and I never will. Reasons:

1) PLAGIARISM!

2) PLAGIARISM!!

3) Would you really tell me the truth if it sucked?

I wouldn't, although there have been times when I've wanted to post "what the hell are you thinking?"

There is a certain amount of inner arrogance that comes with being a writer, and I don't mean that in a harsh way. We all have it. Those who strive to publish believe they have something to say to the masses and, in many cases, they believe it is worth paying for.

But there are those amongst us - and who knows, I may be one of them - who simply delude themselves into thinking they are good at this writing lark. I want to tell you the truth, but I won't, and I'm sorry about that.

Serendipity = searching for images for the words truth hurts and coming across a picture of Tim Roth!

Writing a sequel

2011-09-14T05:34:00.002+10:00

HELP!

Does anyone have advice or links to advice on sequel writing?

I'm about 10,000 words into a first draft, and after a rather dodgy beginning, (which I ended up completely rewriting), I am really getting into the swing of things once more.

But I want to make sure I "follow the rules", or at least any perceived rules for that tricky second book in a trilogy tale.

And why Aragorn I hear you all cry/sigh? Well, (1) My story love interest is - in my mind at least - a younger version; and (2) Duh, he's hot!

All advice welcome, and even if not, feel free to drool!

My 9/11 Story

2011-09-04T17:19:00.004+10:00

Where were you?

It is a question we ask from defining moments in history. I can remember where I was when I discovered Diana had died. I can remember when John Lennon was shot, and when the IRA attempted to murder Maggie Thatcher.

But I remember everything about 9/11 with such crystal clear clarity, it was as if it happened yesterday.

It was a Tuesday afternoon: 2pm. I lived in the UK then you see. My youngest child was only 2 months old and it was my eldest's first day at school.

The day was meant to be memorable for other reasons.

I had just come off the phone to my mother; I had booked us a family holiday to Disneyland Paris. I turned on Sky News and seconds later saw the plane hit the South Tower.

I didn't realise it was live. I didn't even understand what I was seeing. I assumed I had hit the wrong channel and I was watching some film.

The phone was still in my hand. It rang. It was my mother.

"Are you watching this?" she cried.

"Is this real?" was my response.

I can't remember the next few exchanges, because my brain was now catching up with my eyes. I had realised that a good friend of mine, someone I had recently returned from visiting in New York, worked in the World Trade Centre complex.

I can remember yelling, "Mark is in there!" My mum told me to get off the phone to her and so I just hung up without thinking. I called my husband next.

He was working in London. Moments later I was relaying to his entire company what was happening. They stopped working and all went to find a television. Apparently they all crowded into the lobby to watch it on a guest television there.

I phoned another friend. She was already crying when she answered.

"Mark?"

"I know!"

There was nothing else to say. We couldn't reach him because the phone lines were already overloaded.

But real life goes on even in the midst of Armageddon. I drove to my daughter's new school and sat in the car listening to the radio as the South Tower collapsed. I walked in a complete daze into the playground. I expected it to be abuzz with the terrorists attack on the US but, to my disgust, not one single parent knew what was happening. Their lives were filled with gossip and inconsequential nonsense.

Why didn't they know my friend was in there? Why didn't they know that thousands of people were dying at that moment?

I got my daughter, held onto all three of my children, and listened to the car radio as the North Tower collapsed.

The world was surely ending.

I must have cooked for my children but I can't remember doing it. I probably changed some nappies/diapers but I can't remember doing that either. My mother called with a phone number for worried friends and family but if I called it, I can't remember doing so. I just watched those two towers collapse, again and again and again...

Seven hours later, we heard about Mark. His boss had evacuated the floor when the first tower was hit. As he was crossing the Plaza at ground level, the second plane hit. As metal and fuel and glass and bodies rained down, he ran for his life and survived.

I've been to New York twice. Both pre-9/11. The Marriott Hotel we stayed in during our first visit was a few doors down from the World Trade Centres. It was buried. I love that city so much and long to go back. One day soon, I will.

I can't even begin to imagine what the survivors and friends and family of those who died on that day go through. I've shown my children videos of that day because they need to know. They were too young to remember anything that happened during 9/11: the day the world witnessed unbelievable evil, and incredible bravery.

So does 9/11 have a legacy? I believe it does, but the legacy isn't war, or oil, or even a new understanding of modern terrorism, as our so-called leaders would have us assume.

Those who were trapped in the towers didn't spout words of hatred or revenge. Their last thoughts were for those they loved. Their heart-breaking final messages are testament.

When the passengers on United 93 discovered they were almost certainly on a suicide mission, they tried to take back the plane, but they still called their friends and family to tell them they loved them.

My thoughts on that horrific day were for a friend.

Strip away the wars and the conspiracy theories and the hatred and religious divisions and you are left with love.

9/11 changed the world and we should never forget man's capacity for evil.

But ten years later, neither should we forget mankind's capacity to love.

Film review: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two

2011-07-16T11:40:00.003+10:00

Part One review can be found here.

Spoilers!

FACT: The Harry Potter movies will never be as good as the books.

FACT: There is no point in watching a Harry Potter movie if you haven’t read the books. The creative team behind the movies has always lacked the finesse of Peter Jackson and his team, and far too much is taken for granted or omitted altogether.

FACT: Despite this, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part two is an absolute corker of a movie.

Part two begins exactly where part one finished. There is no exposition or prologue; it just starts. And it starts quietly. Harry learns more about wand lore from Ollivander, but if you haven’t read the books, this scene could well be lost on you. The makers are clearly trying to set up the premise for the ultimate ending, but it is something that J.K. Rowling never really got across very well, and so you can’t blame the film-makers for any confusion that ultimately arises.

The first big special effect sequence is in Gringotts. Helena Bonham Carter is hilarious as Hermione pretending to be Bellatrix. The “multiplying” scene in the vault is perfect, and Warwick Davis deserves special mention for oozing nastiness as the duplicitous Griphook.

And then it is straight onto Hogwarts.

There is so much that is great with what follows, but also so much that is flawed. The sense of scope with the Death Eaters and other bad guys storming the castle is breathtaking, but that is not matched by the good guys. A thousand kids, some teachers, and a few Order members are clearly going to be massacred. You’re left wondering why they aren’t in the first five minutes.

The death scenes of the good guys are totally underwhelming, and this is my biggest gripe. The death of Fred Weasley is shockingly portrayed; in fact several people in the audience didn’t even know it was Fred. It is a blink and you’ll miss it scene, and it is in no way comparable to the heartbreak written so well into the book. The battered bodies of Lupin (always my favourite character) and Tonks did draw a collective gasp from the audience though.

But then there was Snape to make up for it.

His death is not as shocking as in the book, but there is something rather artistic and romantic in the way it is filmed. What then follows is the greatest scene in the movie, as Harry collects Snape’s tears and he watches Snape’s memories in the Pensieve. I literally could not breathe as I watched Snape sobbing as he held a dead Lily Potter. This is Alan Rickman’s movie – make no mistake.

The long awaited kiss between Ron and Hermione was perfect. No lingering looks, no romantic build-up - Ron just got stuck in there! Moments later he raised a cheer from the audience when he runs after someone who has just attacked "my girlfriend!" LOVED IT! Rupert and Emma have always had a brilliant chemistry, which unfortunately cannot be said for Dan and Bonnie Wright (Ginny) who have the chemistry of two goldfish swimming in a bowl.

More tears when Harry realises he is a Horcrux and he says goodbye to Ron and Hermione, but the forest scene that follows was muted. The film-makers left SO much out of the Marauders back-story that seeing Sirius, James, Remus and Lily resurrected meant very little. I wanted more; I expected more. It was good, but it didn’t match the brilliance of the written scene.

AND WHAT HAPPENED TO PETER?

The Kings Cross scene was something I was very nervous about. The film-makers have taken enormous liberties over the years with the dialogue of the characters; words that mean so much to the fans. However, in this scene, all of the important words are spoken by Dumbledore and the bloody mess that is the portion of Voldemort's destroyed soul is one of the most gruesome things I have ever seen on screen. This scene was visually perfect. I know there are a lot of people who came away from Deathly Hallows hating Dumbledore, but for me, the Dumbledore we see in Deathly Hallows is the real Dumbledore. A wizard who isn't whimsical, but is a powerful man who was feared by Lord Voldemort. He was a chess master, positioning the pawns (Harry and the Order) for the bigger battle. The chess set is a metaphor in these books and I marvel at the way J.K. Rowling dropped in small indicators throughout the series.

Maggie Smith and Matthew Lewis rock Hogwarts as the battling McGonagall and Neville, and the death of Nagini is brilliant. One of the changes from the novel that I loved was making Voldemort weaken as every Horcrux is destroyed. Ralph Fiennes could have camped it up as Voldemort, but he has done a brilliant job since the Goblet of Fire. I also thought it was genius to have Harry hear the Horcruxes speaking to him in Parseltongue. It was a simple plot device that negated a lot of otherwise necessary exposition.

And then it is all over and the tears start again as the trio hold hands and the final “present day” shot pans away. Dan, Rupert and Emma have done an outstanding job over eight movies. Nothing displays the short existence of childhood as brutally as these movies. The trio are sweet little children in Philosophers Stone; we end Deathly Hallows with them as adults. These three actors shared their childhoods with the world.

The epilogue is adorable. LOVED older Harry, Ron and Malfoy, although I thought they could have aged Hermione a bit more. Little Albus has one heck of a storyline pending should Jo Rowling ever want to revisit – after all, a child with the initials A (Albus) S (Severus) P (Potter) is going in Slytherin!

Deathly Hallows parts one and two aren't perfect in the same way The Lord of the Rings trilogy was. They are uneven in parts, underwhelming in others, and just plain confusing at times. Yet they are a wonderful finale to a film series that has been, for the most part, hugely enjoyable.

And can I make one prediction? Alan Rickman for a best supporting Oscar!

Final words go to Dumbledore: "Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?"

Harry Potter will be forever in my head and my heart, and as long as we believe, it will remain real.

I've seen Deathly Hallows 2!!!

2011-07-14T05:44:00.003+10:00

This is not a review of the movie. Mindful of spoilers, I will wait another few days to do that.

However, I just needed to shout out that last night I finally saw Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part two.

One word was on EVERYONE'S lips as we left the movie theatre, sobbing of course.

SNAPE!

Review to come at the weekend. I can't believe it's all over :(

June musings

2011-06-29T17:18:00.005+10:00

I have been a busy little bee this month. So without further ado:

* I finished my second YA fantasy manuscript today. My happy dance on twitter turned into a happy-snoopy-confetti party. Two weeks ago I never thought this story would find an ending, and then at 6.15am this morning, with a huge grin on my face, I wrote those two magical words: THE END! It is a time-travelling tale and so editing and proofing is going to be a bitch, but right now I am wallowing in the glory that is I DID IT!

* On the reading front I am immersed in two fantasy worlds. I'm on my bazillionth re-read of Harry Potter, and I have also started reading A Game of Thrones. The latter has hooked me already and I am less than 50 pages in.

* I've added the Pages Application to my iPad . I've had one go on it but it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. What I might do is start a brand new manuscript on it and see how simple the formatting is. Right now the iPad is all about Angry Birds! The docking keyboard is awesome though. Very smooth.

* Middle Earth fans rejoice, because this week we saw Bilbo for the first time. See TheOneRing.net for Martin Freeman in his hobbityawesomeness.

* Harry Potter fans rejoice, because J.K. Rowling revealed Pottermore. For those of us who are total Potterheads, it was like old times as we counted down the minutes on twitter and facebook to the big reveal, and then promptly crashed the site as we tried to register for updates!

* Back to the iPad, I downloaded the iBooks feature and after a quick scan of the titles, I decided they were too expensive! I have the tool but right now, nothing is replacing ink and paper.

Oh well, I suppose I had better go write a synopsis for the finished manuscript. Queries I can do; synopses are the devil's to-do list!

Gratuitous post of the month!

2011-06-19T19:54:00.002+10:00

I've spent today editing 73,000 words.

I am blind; I have a headache worthy of the ninth circle of Hell.

I deserve James McAvoy!

But I will at least share him.

You're welcome!

Now please excuse me because I need to die in a corner.

A picture to inspire a thousand words

2011-06-11T07:51:00.006+10:00

Is this the most awesome tree EVER?!

Apparently it is a beech tree, located in the grounds of Stowlangtoft Hall in Suffolk.

The full picture, taken by David Garnham, can be found here.

What are you waiting for? Go write a story about the child-eating monster made of wood that drools ivy!

ETA: OMG, I call myself a Tolkien nerd but I missed the obvious connection. Thanks to Bandersnatch for setting me right in the comments.

ENTWIVES!

Whilst I was sleeping!

2011-05-27T06:01:00.004+10:00

What a lovely surprise! I woke up this morning to find my ickle blog now has 200 followers.

THANK YOU!

But then I went reading my blog roll and twitter feed and I saw posts like this from my lovely friend, Suzie, and I realised that there was actually a concerted effort by my friends to get me over 200 whilst I was asleep!

So I did what any self-respecting wuss would do: I burst into tears!

I seriously love being a writer and the friends that come with it. I will have the biggest grin on my face all day, and most people around me won't realise why!

(I will follow all newbies as soon as I can see who you are - ruddy typical that today is the day my follower page doesn't show up!)

Public domain caution

2011-04-20T05:46:00.004+10:00

A cautionary word of advice from your Auntie Donna!

Some bloggers like to wear their heart on their sleeve. I see nothing wrong with that in theory per se. It is admirable to be so honest to yourself that you want to share every tidbit of information about your life, for good or bad, with your readers.

I just wish - for their sake - that bloggers were a little bit more cautious about what they post.

Public domain is exactly that. IT IS PUBLIC. The Internet can appear to be a cozy little network when you are in your office space, but the reality is something can go viral in minutes and once it is out there, you cannot take it back.

Even posts that get deleted are cached by Google. They can be found. Every single tweet ever posted is recorded, even if it is removed at a later date.

What you say on the Internet is NOT private. Words typed in the heat of the moment cannot be erased. If you slag off an agent or editor, it will come back to bite you. Every hissy fit you have is there in black and white for future employers to see.

And make no mistake, publishing is a business and agents and editors are going to be looking. If it is a choice between two amazing manuscripts, who do you think they will choose to work with? The professional or the hysterical?

Personally I think a big red flashing light should be fitted to every computer that screams a two minute warning before you hit the publish key.

**DO YOU REALLY NEED TO SHARE THIS?**

You cannot take it back.

Sorry NY Times, but women DO love fantasy just as much as the boys

2011-04-17T10:09:00.006+10:00

I'm annoyed now!

The fantastic TheOneRing.net has brought this article to the attention of many a fan today.

And female fantasy fans are NOT happy!

In a rather long-winded review of the new HBO series, Game of Thrones, the writer exudes the following pearl of wisdom:

The true perversion, though, is the sense you get that all of this illicitness has been tossed in as a little something for the ladies, out of a justifiable fear, perhaps, that no woman alive would watch otherwise. While I do not doubt that there are women in the world who read books like Mr. Martin’s, I can honestly say that I have never met a single woman who has stood up in indignation at her book club and refused to read the latest from Lorrie Moore unless everyone agreed to “The Hobbit” first. “Game of Thrones” is boy fiction patronizingly turned out to reach the population’s other half.

[bold mine]

As far as I can see, the only patronizing element of this is the assertion by the writer that no woman wants to watch or read fantasy.

WHAT UTTER RUBBISH!

Does the writer seriously believe that men and boys only turned The Lord of the Rings into the most successful film trilogy of all time? Do only males possess copies of the aforementioned books? Is the writer seriously suggesting that anything to do with Camelot or Wizards or dwarfs or mythical lands is for the ownership of one gender and not the other?

Since when has fiction been segregated?

Now I love my shoes and my handbags and hot men as much as the next girl, but give me a sweaty, dirty, sword-wielding guy like Aragorn or Boromir over a chick-flick/lit male character any day.

Fantasy is my favourite genre to read and write. Period! Whether it is Harry Potter (and the flawed but genius Marauders), or the snarky but brilliant djinni in the Bartimaeus trilogy, or the Shire folk in The Hobbit, I love them all.

The writer may be telling the truth when she claims she knows of no woman in a book club that has ever requested The Hobbit. Well guess what? NOT ALL WOMEN ARE IN A BOOK CLUB!

Quite frankly I am staggered that a respected publication like the NYT would publish such generalising tosh without an editor ripping it to shreds first.

Go back to your stagnant, superficial, one-dimensional heroes and world, Ms Bellafante. Perhaps the NYT could invest in a writer who actually understands fantasy next time. There are millions of fans - male and female - who would appreciate it.

Review: Matched by Ally Condie

2011-04-16T12:10:00.004+10:00

You have to hand it to uber-agent, Jodi Reamer - she certainly knows how to pick 'em.

Matched by author, Ally Condie, is the first in a new dystopian trilogy. It is set in the Society, where Officials choose who you love, what you do and when you die.

The narrator is Cassia who is matched to her best friend Xander. Everything is going beautifully until she starts to fall in love with another boy called Ky.

Matched is definitely the prelude to the story. It sets up the characters, the world and the choices. If is far gentler than The Hunger Games, with its in-your-face dystopian brutality.

But that's the hook! Weaving through every page of this novel is an undercurrent of expectation. The reader knows this is going to get nasty. The reader hopes this is going to get nasty. Will lover betray lover? Is Ky really what Cassia thinks he is? It is the unanswered questions that will ensure I grab the second release, Crossed, later this year.

Condie is a great writer. The prose is beautiful and fluid without being cliched. The characters are likable and not whiny. I also found it refreshing that Cassia's family are integral to the plot. I hate the way some YA likes to forget families exist. They do.

Yet another YA novel for the recommend list. This is going to be as big as The Hunger Games and Twilight, I'm certain of it.

What if literary characters were agents?

2011-04-10T13:17:00.006+10:00

A few literary characters were kind enough to submit their form rejection email to me. I think you’ll find them illuminating!

Mr Darcy: Your manuscript is tolerable, I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me.

Hannibal Lecter: On a similar note I must confess to you, I'm giving very serious thought... to eating your manuscript.

Edward Cullen: It's like your manuscript is my own personal brand of heroin. It is so bad, I intend to OD right now in order to remove it from my sick, masochistic lion...memory, I meant memory.

Dorothy (The Wizard of Oz): Vampires, and Angels, and Mermaids in the same manuscript? Oh, my!

Colonel Jessep (A Few Good Men): You can't handle the truth! Writer, we live in a world that has walls. And those walls have to be guarded by agents with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Stephen King and you curse J.K Rowling. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that most manuscripts are tragic. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves rain forests...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at writer's conferences, you want me on the end of this email. You need me on this email.

Gandalf: Many manuscripts that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. For even the very wise cannot see all ends. This is my arty-farty way of saying thanks but no thanks.

Severus Snape: Rejectius manuscriptiosa.

Jane Eyre: Writer, I rejected you.

Rhett Butler: Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn about your manuscript.

Shakespeare (Hamlet): Rosencrantz and Guilderstern are dead, as are thy ambitions as a writer.

Eeyore: This writing business. Pencils and what-not. Over-rated, if you ask me. Silly stuff. Nothing in it.

Bad blogger?

2011-04-05T05:51:00.004+10:00

I am starting to notice mass trends amongst the blogs I follow. Currently it is something called the A-Z challenge. Blogfests are another calling that bloggers seem to salivate over.

I'm sorry if other writers think less of me for not joining in, but that's not how this blog rolls. I want to share individual stories and thoughts and articles about the literary world. If other writers have fun doing these events, then go for it, but it just isn't me.

Review: Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins

2011-03-18T19:17:00.004+11:00

Only two books in my history have seen me reach the final page and then immediately turn back to the front cover in order to devour the same story again.

The first occasion was ten years ago when my husband gave me a book about a book called Harry who turns out to be a wizard!

The second occasion was a couple of weeks ago when I finally got around to reading Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins.

Now many of you will have read this book already. Many of you will have blogged about it.

But I just need to put down in my own words just how tickly this book made me feel!

Tickly!

It was like falling in love and the excitement that comes with it all the while knowing things aren't going to get messy and gooey and your heart won't end up breaking and your mascara will stay on your lashes where it belongs and not streaming down your face like an aged glam rocker who should know better!

*deep breath*

Because OMG I loved this book so much. Every time I thought Anna and St. Clair were going to get together my stomach would flip and flop and make me squirm and laugh because it tickled!

I loved the use of language and the way the characters were believable and not perfect. The Christmas holiday scenes were so brilliant I never wanted the holiday to end.

I didn't want the book to end.

The best contemporary YA book I have ever read. Period.

Review: No and Me by Delphine de Vigan

2011-02-08T18:58:00.004+11:00

I LOVED this book. If you are a reader, No and Me is exactly the kind of book you want to read. If you are a writer, No and Me is exactly the kind of book you want to write.

The setting is Paris. The narrator is thirteen-year-old, Lou Bertignac. She is smart yet flawed. One day she meets an older homeless girl called No and Lou sets out to change her life, aided along the way by her best friend, Lucas.

What I absolutely adored about this novel was the innocence surrounding such a dark subject. Things are black and white when you are a teenager. You believe you can change the world and make a difference. As you get older and more jaded, then realism replaces optimism.

What Delphine de Vigan captured was that aura of invincibility, whilst all the while projecting on the reader the hopelessness of it. Lou is a well written character and the dynamics of her friendships is offset against the angst she feels towards her parents, despite the fact they do something rather incredible.

There isn't one character who is unlikeable in this novel. No is not sugar-coated, and she does some pretty dreadful things, yet you worry about her and root for her the whole way. It wasn't her fault. The prose is brilliant and sophisticated, exactly how I like to read my YA.

And of course there is a little bit of romance thrown in for good measure.

Read this book. You will not be able to get it out of your system once you have.

Help me to follow you!

2011-02-04T04:41:00.004+11:00

This is a plea fellow bloggers.

I know it is hard to resist the urge to pack our blogs with fancy graphics and tabs and links and images and cookies and muffins, but do some of you realise just how long your blogs take to load?

Today a post appeared on my blog role that immediately caught my attention. I wanted to comment. I tried to comment. Unfortunately - somewhere between the landscape wallpaper and the five billion word profile blurb - I lost the will to live waiting for the comment box to appear.

The comment box is always the last thing to appear!

I follow you because you are interesting. I follow you because I think you are a good writer. I want to share in your hopes and successes. HELP ME! Cut back on the fancy additions. Less is more after all.

Therein lies the heart

2011-02-01T06:16:00.004+11:00

Think of your favourites books. Or movies and television shows for that matter.

The one thread that all successful writing will contain is a character who beats out the heart of the story. And more often than not, that character is not the voice of the tale.

Take The Lord of the Rings. Whilst Frodo was the hobbit with the battle, and Aragorn the character with the destiny to fulfil, it was actually Samwise Gamgee who carried the heart of the book. He wasn't glamorous or exciting; he was a gardener! Yet he was loyal and brave and willing to go to the depths of hell for his friend.

It is the same with Harry Potter. The books, whilst not a first person narrative, are still from Harry's perspective. Yet the heart of that story beats inside Ron Weasley. The dynamics between Harry, Ron and Hermione shifted dramatically when Ron wasn't around. Neither Harry or Hermione were complete. Ron was petty and jealous and yet the most faithful loyal person there was. Harry needed him; Hermione needed him. And so did the reader.

I'm currently watching The West Wing. I've been obsessed with that tv show since it first aired. It is full of dynamic, intelligent, witty characters like Josh Lynam, C.J. and even President Bartlett. Yet when Sam Seabourne left - (actor Rob Lowe) - that moral core, the heartbeat, went out of the show. It was never the same.

Other examples off the top of my head:

Jane Eyre would be a novel about a rather pious young woman - if it were not for the brooding presence of the gorgeous Mr. Rochester.

It is the lowly Hassan in The Kite Runner who the reader roots for, not the main protagonist, Amir.

Give me Gale in The Hunger Games over Peeta or even Katniss, any day!

Writing needs a great premise, characterisation and plot. But never forget the heart.

Review: The Bartimaeus Trilogy by Jonathan Stroud

2011-01-16T06:36:00.006+11:00

I love finding a fantasy series that I can get my teeth into. What is even more preferable is if that series is actually finished and I can read the entire story - book after book after book - without having to wait for more publications.

(Seriously, kids of the future will have no idea how lucky they are to be able to read all seven Potter books without having to undergo the torture of waiting for years between novels. PAIN, we felt pain, kids!)

Just before Christmas I discovered the Bartimaeus Trilogy by Jonathan Stroud: The Amulet of Samarkand, The Golem's Eye and Ptolmey's Gate.

Basic premise: Modern day London is ruled by wizards. A young apprentice called Nathaniel summons up a djinni called Bartimaeus. Mayhem ensues!

The novels unfold using a mixture of third person and first person narrative, with the latter using the voice of Bartimaeus. It is this voice that makes the books so thoroughly enjoyable. Bartimaeus has to be controlled, after all, he is a modern day genie in the lamp, but his mouth is his best tool for disruption. He is hilarious, witty and obscenely rude. Each book takes us on Nathaniel's journey, from young boy to Government politician, and each novel gets better and better. Stroud has taken historical figures and blended them effortlessly into this new world, thereby making the fantastical, believable.

And just when you think the story has become too surreal, you are brought back down to earth with some truly moving moments. The ending, whilst sad, is extremely satisfying.

A brilliant trilogy. If you love MG/YA fantasy - this is definitely for you.

Film review: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part One

2010-11-19T05:55:00.004+11:00

WARNING: Here be slight spoilers, enter at own risk!

I am a Potter geek. An uber-fan. I have read the books countless times and have even represented the Potter community as a fan consultant on the Order of the Phoenix video game.

I know and love my Potter.

When I first heard that WB were splitting this novel into two films, I was dismayed. In my opinion, it is the worst book in the series, filled with stagnant scenes, characters suddenly acting out of character, written with a text that is bloated by deus ex machina plot tools. Two movies was a money making exercise as far as I was concerned, and given the fact that the thorn in many a fan's side - Steve Kloves - was penning the script, I thought this was a car crash waiting to happen.

I could not have been more wrong.

This film has finally achieved what fans of the series have been crying out for. Harry's final journey is allowed to unfold with humour, tears and terror at such a beautiful pace that every scene is perfect. Past movies, whilst brilliant, have rushed along at such a rollercoaster rate that the meaning, the heart behind the epic story, just got lost in a quagmire of special effects.

You don't ever feel like you are being rushed with DH Part One. You can just sit back and revel in the great acting.

And it is Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson who make this film so special. Daniel has always been fantastic, with the exception of some rather nervous acting in the beginning, so that wasn't a surprise. Mercifully, Kloves has kept the humour in Ron, but has finally balanced the gorm with the great. Everyone who loves these books knows that book Ron is brave and loyal, but that has been lost in every film since Chamber of Secrets for the sake of the funnies. In DH Part One, we get our Ron back.

Emma Watson steals every scene she is in. She has become an accomplished actress, finally realising that you don't need to wiggle your eyebrows to portray emotion.

The highlights for me were:

The Ministry of Magic scene as they hunt down the locket Horcrux - very funny
The changing of the seven Potters - again, laugh out loud the whole time
Godric's Hollow - moving and then scary as hell
The torture scene - simply for Emma Watson's acting which will make your blood run cold
THAT death scene - those who have read the book will know which one I am talking about. Never before have I witnessed such a loud collective of sobbing in a cinema. Unbelievably moving.
Nagini

On that last point, be warned. The snake is fricking terrifying. Small children will have nightmares. The Charity Burbage scene in the beginning is simply horrific.

I have such high hopes now for Part Two. If WB can turn a turgid camping holiday into such a blast, just imagine what they will do when the battle hits Hogwarts!

Come on, own up - who is £139,250 poorer this morning?

2010-10-30T17:58:00.005+11:00

A rare first edition of Pride & Prejudice has been sold at Sotherby's in London for a ball-busting $139,250.

It wasn't the only rare masterpiece either. Top of the lot was a signed first edition of A Christmas Carol which went for £181,250.

The collection was sold by a 75-year-old collector who had spent forty five years amassing the collection. In total, over £3.1 million was raised according to this article in the Daily Mail.

Also sold were first editions for Wuthering Heights, Frankenstein, and a collection of poems by Shakespeare that dated back to 1640.

If this story is for real, then this collection should never have been split up. A museum should have bid for the lot and kept it together. A travelling exhibition would surely have recouped the outlay. I would certainly pay to see so many first edition classics in the same room.

Oh to not have a mortgage and school fees to pay!

New Zealand IS Middle Earth

2010-10-24T10:03:00.006+11:00

Tomorrow is Labour Day in New Zealand.

Tomorrow is also the day that may see New Zealand lose The Hobbit to a film set overseas.

Because of the utterly reprehensible and irresponsible actions of a few union officials, Warner Bros executives are flying into Wellington to meet with Peter Jackson with a view to moving The Hobbit film overseas.

THIS CANNOT HAPPEN!

New Zealand IS Middle Earth. The scenery and landscape of that beautiful country helped make the fantastical, believable. Moving it away will ruin the entire essence of the movies.

Tomorrow there will be marches across New Zealand. I urge anyone who can help to do so. If you care about literary adaptations, if you care about Tolkien's world, if you care about the thousands of people who will lose their jobs and their livelihoods if this happens, then blog about it, tweet about it, and if you can get to one of the six cities and towns in New Zealand where there will be a rally - THEN DO SO!

I support Peter Jackson and his team unequivocally and I know my friends in NZ will be out there doing the same.

New Zealand will not go down without a fight.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tu49X4EsT0

A message from the great Sir Ian McKellen to the Pope

2010-09-19T14:48:00.005+10:00

Could I love this man more?

Nope, don't think so!

(I never get political on this blog, but today I make an exception. Only when tolerance becomes second nature will we stamp out ignorance and hate.)

Here endeth the lesson!